Bless Me Fashion, For I Have Sinned

The MoG series that presents modern style atrocities and attempts to articulate their hideousness in merely one (usually run-on) sentence.
"So then my BF says 'We should both wear these and be the talk of the beach,' which is apparently moron-code for sympathetic sunbathers stopping by to marvel at the technological wonder of my IBM-colored prosthetic, what's your excuse?"


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